How are we raising our children?
Some
of you might already know that I'm a USMC Veteran and 'that' might
influence in part my character. I never got "an allowance" as a child
and neither did my wife and we turned out ok. Both academically
prepared, she has a BS in Electrical Engineering and I have a BA in Political Science and a BA in Africana Studies. I believe that everyone should pull the weight of their home.
We
[wife & I] have 4 children. Very polite, respectful and well
behaved. We do our part providing and taking care of them, while they do
their part getting good grades and doing what they are assigned to do
at home. They are well fed, well clothed, well traveled, well cultured
and have always lived a very comfortable life, not to mention that they
have ALWAYS enjoyed of our UNDIVIDED ATTENTION, APPRECIATION and most
importantly, our LOVE.
I don't allow my children to play
on the streets, because times are not the same as when I was growing
up. Usually, every day they get to go to the "Boys & Girls Club",
the "YMCA" or I take them to the park to burn energy playing and being
children, but ONLY after finishing •their academic & home duties•.
THEY
GET NO ALLOWANCE and still function perfectly like the good children
they are and great members of society they surely will be.
3
of them are in gifted courses at school and the other is in advanced
placement. They are involved in extra curricular activities both in and
out of school, they speak two languages and are in the process of
learning a third.
A "child" needs NO MONEY of their own. A child is a child. A child ONLY needs a safe home with loving and responsible parents.
Imagine that...
Why
does a child need money for? As a parent... if they "want" something,
either you buy it because THEY DESERVE/NEED IT... or you don't! Period!
The
ONLY money I could probably consider as PARTIALLY theirs, is money
received from someone else as a gift. If at the time of receiving the
funds, they need/deserve something, well... those funds will definitely
be destined to fulfill that need. If they don't "need" anything at the
time of the gift, then they get to spend it under DIRECT SUPERVISION and
approval, or deposit the cash in their BANK ACCOUNT (with academic
destination).
My children have a list of DUTIES posted on the refrigerator to assess and carry on, after doing their school OBLIGATIONS
and I dare them to 'demand' ANY money. The graphic below denotes my
children's Duty List of weekly house tasks. Some of the terminology is
regular Marine Corps lingo (Barracks/room, Chow Hall/Informal Dinning,
Head/Bathroom,...). The list is number/color coded to designate each
specific duty as follow:
1 Gyäsi (14y/o boy): yellow
2 Gözie (12y/o boy): green
3 Gyäni (12y/o boy): blue
4 Gysäni (10y/o girl): purple
2 Gözie (12y/o boy): green
3 Gyäni (12y/o boy): blue
4 Gysäni (10y/o girl): purple
Video
consoles, games, handheld devices, electronics and "brand-name"
clothing/shoes ARE NOT FREE and NEITHER they are mandatory for a parent
to provide. My kids have them all because they "pay" with EXCELLENT GRADES & BEHAVIOR. There is no such a thing as getting anything below a "B" in my house or there would be consequences.
I'm
not a hypocrite person demanding from them what I myself don't give an
example of. No! I demand from them excellence, because I give then
excellence. They have access to my own academic grades to serve as
leverage. Education starts at home...
"Educate the children of today, so we won't have to punish the adults of tomorrow".
